It's the wee hours of December 28 at the time I write this, as we're staring down the barrel of the New Year. Every year is interesting, each with its own highs and lows. Generally, the year's been pretty good. The fact is, that anything crappy that happens usually bears fruit eventually that brings us into better times. That's something to keep in mind, specifically when things get rough.
On a personal note... actually this whole blog entry is personal... the last couple of months has been less than great. The wife's health has presented its share of challenges for her, but she's bounced back from all of it, as she always does. When (if?) I grow up I hope I get to be as tough as she is.
November 18 was the pinnacle date of the year, kind of, in that we would see KISS for the last time in Montreal with our daughter and her man. We took off on Friday the seventeenth for Quebec, driving through what would be quite a challenging ride at times, with heavy rain hampering the road conditions. Generally, though, it was an uneventful trek. We got there in around nine hours, in spite of the bad weather. I drove all the way there and then back on Sunday when we left. When we got to the motel that we'd booked online on Friday night, it was far from overwhelming, but perhaps adequate. It wound up being a rather sleazy, seedy place in an older part of Montreal, but the room for four adequately enough housed us for the weekend. It was close enough to the Bell Centre where the show was going to be, maybe a 45 minute walking distance if we'd chosen to do that, which we did. We thought we'd walk so we could see some of the sights a bit of downtown Montreal.
I remember telling the kids that they'll love Montreal. We'd seen a few shows there, and the crowd was always raucous and the people gracious and friendly. Last time we were there for a show was in '05 for the U2 Vertigo Tour, which broke all the records at the time. We'd seen KISS a couple of times before that. Every time we'd go, the concert was like a huge party among 18,000 friends. Janice and me were pretty excited to experience it all again, and to let the kids experience what we did.
It was an odd time for the KISS End of the Road Tour to be winding down, with only two weeks of shows left after this. The band was to play Quebec City, Ottawa and then Toronto after Montreal. Thank God we were going to see this. As anyone who knows me realizes, we were robbed of our opportunity to see this show in Bangor in '20 because the borders closed because of Covid, and Ticketmaster refused to refund our tickets. So we were out over $400. Surely we wouldn't get screwed out of seeing this tour again. Right?
We left the motel around noon-ish, and began our trek on foot for the Bell Centre area. Montreal is loaded with little shops and boutiques, something for just about everyone. I'd never seen so many Tesla cars in one place. You can barely hear those cars when they drive by. But something seemed different about the city this time. The people seemed a bit more tense and impatient. The stores we went into offered less than subpar service. In fact, one of the only smiles I'd seen was when I stopped to give a homeless man a few dollars. The vibe in the air was certainly different from times gone by, bearing in mind that it's been eighteen years since we've been there. But a lot can change in a year... let alone 18.
We had to navigate around long protest marches that were going on in favor of the Palestinians in the Israel/Gaza war. Lots of cops around keeping things in order. It was a peaceful protest, though in my opinion pointless. Nothing these protesters did was going to change anything that was going to happen half a world away from us.
Ultimately, we settled into a little basement bar downtown - the name of which escapes me at the moment - drawn in by the KISS music that was blaring from their speakers beckoning the likes of ourselves to come in and have a bite. We did just that. The people were all KISS fans in there, some wearing makeup and costumes even. Yet I just didn't get that friendly buzz that we used to get. Don't get me wrong, everyone was well behaved, but that brotherly feeling amongst everyone was kind of lacking like it was in the past. Even the servers were kind of cold. But the food was great. Janice and me ordered our usuals; she got her Club Sandwich and I got my fish & chips. I forget what the kids got, but we all enjoyed what we had; though Alexandra wasn't feeling totally great, thanks to Tom. Cole had an eye on her. He'd just gotten over a bad bout of norovirus prior to the trip. We had our meal and we were off to the streets hovering around the Bell Centre until showtime. The air was quite chilly, so we stopped into a shop where I bought a toque. We also stopped into a Tim Horton's, where we sipped our beverages to bide the time away.
To the venue we go, with the throngs of KISS fans - you'd know them when you saw them - descended upon the arena. I was a bit nervous about the tickets being on my phone, worrying about connectivity issues, but those fears were unfounded as we were quickly admitted when our turn came. We checked out the merch table, which had a monster lineup of fans waiting to snap up the various items being offered. Janice really wanted the hoodie they had, but someone had bought the last one just before she could reach it. And that last one went to Alexandra. No worries, we can just get one for her online, and probably cheaper, since the venue tacks on their own fees for selling the merch.
Then it was time to take our seats. It was then that I realize we'd gotten the shittiest tickets for a KISS show ever. The stage was massive, but in an arena of that size from the balcony, it seemed smaller than it was. It was the biggest stage production KISS had ever put on, and it showed; but from our vantage point, we didn't get to see it head-on as if we had seats in the bowl. The seats themselves were cramped and tight. And it seemed that the show was standing room only in the whole arena except for the section we were in. Janice and me were the only ones standing and screaming in our section at times, and the guy sitting next to Cole was being a complete dick with his man-spread seating. Some kid in front of us was busy recording the whole concert on his phone not even interacting with the show. And some big goof behind us dressed up as The Demon poked at Janice telling her to sit down as Paul Stanley flew to our area of the venue. "I got boots that make me nine feet tall! I can't stand up!" Well you should've thought about that beforehand going to a KISS show then, shouldn't ya, cupcake? He muttered something in French and Janice turned and barked at him, "ENGLISH." It didn't get much better. Somebody else in our section threw a full glass of beer at that same guy but wound up dousing us, too. All said, it was the worst crowd experience I'd ever had at a KISS show.
But as far as the concert goes, it was a wild one. Lots of fire, bombs, effects, confetti, even balloons filled the air at various points of the show. Gene and Tommy (band members) got on lifts that took them overhead midway through the arena. Paul, as I said earlier, flew to our part of the building for a few songs. Lasers galore. The video screens made sure that even seats like ours could get a good view of the band, which was nice. Eric's drums rose a couple of times - each guy got their own solo spot, specifically designed to give the rest of the band a breather from the more than two hour set. Gene didn't fly to the ceiling this time though, opting instead for a lift that brought him up, probably for stability purposes. Not to mention The Demon's not getting any younger, in his mid 70s. He did the whole breathing fire/blood spitting thing, complete with probably the most evil looking imagery even by Gene's standards. The band was TIGHT. I'm not sure if they've ever sounded better, but KISS has always sounded great to me live. I neglected to mention that the opening band, Crown Lands - a two-piece outfit - was quite good, to me reminiscent of earlier Rush, and they were given a ridiculous amount of stage room and lights, and the sound for them was as good as KISS' was. KISS has never been about trying to show up an opening band. In fact they'd help them however they could. But back to KISS.... it was pretty cool also seeing Sam, finally, make the stage. Sam is the giant serpent on
Gene's side of the stage that would blow smoke at various points of the show. There's not much for me to say about the stage pods - giant octagonal light rigs, probably over a dozen of them, that rose and descended at various times of the show, with all different colors and imagery on their video screens. I say not much to say, because from our point of view, we only really saw them from the edges instead of face-on. By the time the encores came around, we all knew we were going to see the guys playing 'Rock and Roll All Night' for the last time, and the crowd was bonkers for the umpteenth sing-along. This audience, I have to say though, is not the same audience we're used to witnessing in Montreal. Loud and boisterous, yes, but Montreal usually went beyond that. This isn't limited to the people in the venue. We got this same vibe from everyone in the city. Perhaps the air was tense from the demonstrations - or perhaps it's the population explosion of Montreal. The Quebec government isn't a favorite in the polls these days, with a lot of segregation issues and terrible linguistic policies that make it often less than welcoming. I know that we four didn't exactly feel the love from Montreal this trip.
The show got over, we left for the streets to hail down a cab back to the motel. Pretty cheap, really, $25 got the four of us back. We had a bite to eat, with probably the worst Big Mac I've ever had that seemed like it was assembled by a blind man with half a pint of sauce. One gas station I went to to try to get a pack of Tums, I was met with an attendant who didn't understand a lick of English and he just looked at me like I was an alien, so I said 'nevermind' and moved on. That's generally the reception we got from this trip. We got up the next morning and didn't waste a whole lot of time packing up and getting back on the road home.
And the road home was pretty good. Another nine hour drive, uneventful, with the weather being far better except for the odd snow squall. We got home early Sunday evening, leaving us lots of time to unwind before we would all be home to decompress from the trip. All in all, this wasn't a great experience. We took in the show, which was the best part of everything of course, but I will say that we won't be going back to Montreal anytime soon for any reason. In fact, now that KISS is done, I don't know that we'll hit the road for any show now. I certainly won't accept nosebleed seats for a concert ever again, either. Still, Alexandra and Cole say they really enjoyed themselves, aside from various issues I already mentioned, and they were appreciative of all of it. It was actually a Christmas/birthday present for Alexandra. We paid for pretty much everything for them and were delighted to.
The following three days were something else. I was still recovering from nearly 20 hours of driving over three days when I took a bit of a bad trip with one of my cannabis oil doses, thinking that it would brighten my mood a little, but the opposite happened, not necessarily because of the oil. I was in bed for three straight days without eating or drinking anything. Literally. Not a drop of water or a crumb. There are other reasons I was spiraling that I can't get into here. I finally came around a bit Thursday that week, but would need a lot longer to recover.
Alexandra didn't fare so well. Upon returning, shortly after she wound up with her own bout of norovirus. Come to find out, after the KISS show in Montreal, they went to Quebec City, but then had to cancel the next three shows because of Paul Stanley getting sick from what appeared to be the same vicious virus. He even said he wondered if it might be 'his time', he was that sick. So this norovirus is a particularly harsh one, not that it's ever a picnic. But that's how close we were to missing this show, again. Man would I have been upset!
A couple of weeks ago, I decided to get some things done that were gnawing at me. I needed to get a couple of remote starters for the car, because the ones we had for the last 13 years kind of bit the biscuit. Plus there was a chip in the windshield that we took on our Montreal trip that I had to get repaired, which wound up spreading, and we don't have comprehensive insurance on our vehicle, to that set us back $400. I had to get my license renewed too, another hundred or so dollars. Needless to say, this made us have to scrimp when it came to Christmas. But, such is life. No one gets a free ride.
I remember the day I got all that done, we thought we'd celebrate a bit and get stuffed cheesy bread and pasta from Domino's. When I came back from picking up the order, I found Janice in the bathroom being sick. So yes, Janice's number was called for the norovirus and now it was her turn. Boy, was she sick. Scary sick. I'd never seen her that sick from a stomach virus before, and it just wasn't letting up. She spent a whole day running to the bathroom with it coming out of both ends. It was so sad and upsetting that it made me cry. I did what I could for her, tucking her in, rubbing her head, doting on any of her needs. It was crushing to witness - the person I love the most being so ill. She goes through enough with the illnesses she has without having to deal with this. And again, this isn't just any stomach virus. This one was particularly vicious. I read up on some things about this bug going around, and apparently it's pretty widespread. I even Googled if there'd ever be a cure or better treatment for norovirus. Come to my surprise, they are actually making headway on an eventual vaccine for this, though it's probably a few years away. I thought maybe I'd take some kind of preventative measure if I could. I read that oil of oregano is shown to be at least somewhat effective against stomach bugs. When I went to the store to get Janice supplies for her pending BRAT diet, I picked up a bottle of oregano oil capsules. I took one when I got home. Janice finally seemed to be settling down, though recovery would take days.
But wait, there's more!
When I woke up late Friday morning, I went to the bathroom and, boom, it was my turn. I mounted the porcelain throne and grabbed the wastebasket, and the room started spinning. My God, there's nothing worse in the world to me than puking. I've written about it before here, that when I was young, up until I was about ten or eleven, I was sick almost every Christmas. A couple of times I was so sick that I couldn't hardly move. My brother Pete would attest to that, because I remember him carrying me to the bathroom so I could do my business. Memories of all those times stuck with me, and I've never been able to calm down while being sick since, so I gasp and choke for air and panic. Janice and me both think I have PTSD from those wild vomiting days when I was young. Alas.... in this particular instance, I didn't throw up. I felt like I was going to, but I didn't. This made me wonder if that oregano oil actually had an effect on the virus in my stomach. My gut, though, different story. It came out of me like a firehose, as Janice put it. So much, and so bad, in fact, that when I stood up to clean myself off, ... let's just say the next thing I remember I was hearing "Michael! Michael! MIKE!" I lifted my head to find myself on the bathroom floor, having lost consciousness and cracked my head on a couple of things on the way to the floor. Janice was beside herself. I re-mounted the throne and let it rip some more. Janice.... God love her.... cleaned me up and helped me back to bed. I was white as a sheet and sweating like a racehorse, she said. Of course, that wasn't the end of it. About an hour later, I hobbled back to the bathroom and took a seat - more firehose-worthy dumpage ensued. This time Janice had her eye on me, pride be damned. I once again stood up to clean myself off, and once again down I went, out cold, cracking my right side on the bathtub on the way down. Janice woke me up again, prying me off of the bathtub, once again cleaning me off. I was out cold so I was dead weight until I came to after a couple of minutes. The thing that bothers me the most about all of this is how this must look to Janice. We both love and care about each other so much that it's quite distressing when one of us sees the other in this kind of shape. I had to go back to the bathroom a few more times, but it was uneventful, and I just had the runs. So even though I didn't throw up, it was as if I had. Come to find out, upon me investigating, there really is a phobia about being sick like that. I have never had an easy time being sick - I can handle a cold or even a flu, even Covid, but not a cursed stomach virus. My life is literally in danger now if I have to deal with that, to the point that Janice wants to be near if it happens, because the last three times now, I've blacked out and fainted, and twice gotten head injuries over it. This time, I wound up with three goose eggs on my noggin from collapsing. Even right now I can feel them. And on this particular occasion, I actually cracked a rib on the bathtub. We even worried there might be a floating rib from this, but I got x-rayed and the crack is indeed there, but no floaters. Thank God. But now I have the next month-plus to get over this rib injury. Just what is it with me and rib injuries, I have no flippin' idea.
To add icing to that cake, I wound up with a monster sinus headache that lasted well over a day, bad enough to make sunlight a dire enemy. I'm prone to these often, so I have Sudafed Advance to ward these headaches off, very successfully. I used to lose a few work days due to those. But thankfully I found S/A and was able to take care of it. Here's the thing, though.... there's a shortage everywhere of this particular med. So I didn't have it this time and had to ride it out. And man, that was a long 24-36 hours. Excruciating at times. But I got through it.
So for anyone reading this thinking I'm one of those man-babies when he gets sick, you're right.... kind of. Only when I have to be sick to my stomach. And it stems from childhood trauma. It makes me shudder to think of what might've happened had Janice not been around when all this happened to me.
I've read that cognitive behavioral therapy can help this a great deal, but alas, I've been seeking that for my mental illness since forever. I'm convinced there is no help for me and that I'm on my own. I actually need help in that area now more than ever, but it just isn't there for me. My cries for help fall on deaf ears of professionals. Knowing this just makes me even more down. I feel like I'm quite literally on my own.
Anyway, Christmas indeed wound up being super low key. I like to read for mass at church at Christmas time, but I had to tell them I couldn't because of all this kerfuffle. So I've basically been housebound for the last four or five days. Janice seems to be mostly recovered, thankfully, as she has work and all. I'm much better now, but still in recovery of sorts. All this being connected to the PTSD thing, it plays on my mind as much as it does my body. At least digestively, things appear to be nearly better. And the goose eggs have shrunk. The thought of a potential concussion isn't lost on me either. Like I need more of those!
What we've decided to do about Christmas dinner is put it off until New Year's Eve and have the kids over then. We were just in no shape at all to do it over the actual Christmas holidays. The bright side of it all is, we got through it. That virus is behind us now, and we're a bit stronger because of it.
Also, it was my birthday on the 26th, and though I don't post hardly at all on facebook, I do appreciate the birthday wishes. If you're one of those folks and you're reading this, thank you.
I'd like to thank my friend Wayne for checking in on me, too. A little thoughtfulness can go a long way. I think he realizes that.
This will likely be my last blog entry for the year. What a way to go out, eh? Frig.
I hope you had a great holiday, and that you have a great New Year's to go with it. Stay safe and love and care for each other.
