Friday, January 27, 2012

To be... or not to be.

I need to address something before I go any further with Ragnar.

I'm ready to mothball this blogsite.  The last comment I received was from 'anonymous', who very, very clearly missed the entire point of my last posting altogether.  My intent was to focus on suicide victims and see what can be learned from their plight, so as they may not have died in vain.  I thought it was clear.  Crystal clear actually.

But if the things of a serious nature that I write about are going to be taken out of context so frequently, I'm ready to scrap this place.  Especially if comments of an 'anonymous' nature come rolling in.  It's just not worth it to me.  I invite 'anonymous' to e-mail me privately if necessary and open up some dialogue about this comment.  But since I'm at a disadvantage, allow me to offer my own observations.

"Life is tough at times..." yeah, no joke.  People go through spurts where it downright sucks.  And then some of them go to extremes and don't even want to live anymore.  That's why I wrote this.  "actually it is tough a lot of the time but it can be pleasant based on the way we handle situations and people."  Why do I feel like I was being talked down on here?  I'm 46 friggin' years old and I've seen my share.  'Anonymous' better not be a squeaky eared, cheese eating high school student.  "I think it is important that when we speak of important people in our lives that we only speak of the good times and not the bad especially if they are deceased."  This is the part that riled me the most.  When someone commits suicide, it isn't because of the good times.  Therefore we need to discuss what went wrong to try to prevent others from doing the same thing.  Again, for the love of God, that was the point of the blog.  And I didn't mention names to protect those who might not want mentioning, understandably.  But my dad... well, he was My Dad.  I know Dad does know how I feel, because I believe in the afterlife.  And I don't believe he would have objections to my trying to bring redemption to him by attempting to help others based on what he went through.  I love my Mom and Dad.  So my perception here is that I disrespected his memory by discussing this.  And that deeply offends me.  "Stay positive, live positive and talk positive and respect everyone at all times will make life for all of us a WONDERFUL place to live."  Again... I know this is redundant... being 'positive' wasn't as easy as it is said for those I talked about.  Again, (sigh... I hate sounding so repetitive) we should be looking around us at those who have a hard time "staying positive".  Not all of us are cut from the same cloth and have the same gifts as others, in the way of something as complex as chemical balance/imbalances in our brains, and we all have our own life experience.  I know I certainly have an easier time being positive when I have my wife and daughter with me, and I'm one of those 'defective' individuals who struggle with 'being positive' sometimes.  It's just not as easy as turning on a switch in our heads and putting on a happy face.  Indeed, to tell all of us to 'be positive' is to show ignorance.  Walk a mile in another man's shoes if you want to know where he comes from.

Anyway, I don't want to discourage comments either.  But I do encourage authors to be relevant.

I might desert this site and just write my blogs on my facebook page like I was doing for a short while.  That way there can be no 'anonymous'.  If I do that, my facebook page will go to private once again.  

I'm sorry to any readers of this site that have been faithful to it.  We'll see where it goes.

Thanks for reading.


  1. I want you to keep writing these messages and if anonymous does not like what they are reading, well please address concerns with your name on your comments.


  2. I agree with Janice. Please do not take this blog away. I've always enjoyed your stories as your feelings are so true, and dear to all of our hearts! xo love yas, m

  3. Just read your blog Mr Cook and had not seen the comment from Mr "Positive". I am not sure as to what bubble they have lived in all their life but there are several flawed things in what they say.

    1 - You can't assume you understand the way each and every person thinks. Each person is different in their own way. Person number 1 may need to talk about their problems, issues, etc and get them off their chest to achieve that inner peace (I am one of those people - get it out is my motto) while person number 2 can just ignore it - sweep it under the mat so to speak while person number 3 can just focus on things that are peaceful.

    2 - While I can understand what 'anon' was saying in not disrespecting the dead - I don't get that at all from your blog - you are stating issues that made up who you are today - to choose to simply ignore that would be foolish.

    3 - To say that life is tough sometimes but can be pleasant the way we handle situations and people is true to a point but once again it all depends on who you are and what the situations are. For example – today in our community there is a little boy Kendrick Campbell who was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He attends my childs daycare. His mother was out on maternity leave when he was diagnosed and his father had just lost his job. After treatment after treatment, travelling all over with no money and just fueled by the love for your child and a caring community they just found out he has three more tumors wrapped around his spine and diagnosed as inoperable. So what I challenge Mr “Anon” is to go up to that family and say – yeah life is tough but it can be pleasant based on how you handle this situation. My point is that you can’t judge a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes.

    I have known Mike for over 20 years and he, as all of us do, has his faults. Mike has a large heart and wears his emotions on his sleeve - he is quite an open book and draws strength on those around him. For Mike to open up about his make-up and who he is - is a large step for him as it helps people understand him better. It is a hard thing for people to do - to open up and tell people what makes them tick and truth be known more people should.

    This is a public blog so to speak but people that read it obviously know Mike and that is why they read it. For someone to know Mike and to post their comment (especially with anon) is selfish and ill received by me. If you truly felt this way than you should have sourced out Mike in person and asked about it.

    Mike don’t change who you are, not for me and not for anybody. Blog away my friend!

    Jean Guy Rubberboot

  4. Further to my above comment . . . . . . .

    I guess irony is the word of the day as we read the above message that basically states if you are suffering from some form of mental illness you should keep quiet and think positive - the ironic thing about it is this . . .

    Plastered all over the news right now on tv and radio is an ad from Former Olympic Champion Clara Hughes in which she says - 1 in 5 Canadians suffer from mental illness and the stigma attached to it makes them keep quiet about it as if in shame. This is something that they need to talk about and that is why on Feb 8 Bell Canada is donating money for each text that people send towards this worthy cause.

    I just thought it suited what this was all about and as above - keep on blogging my friend!

    Jean Guy aka Tim Churchill

  5. You are THE MAN, JGR. A 100% true friend.

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  7. I don't like that comment about the squeeky eared cheese eating high school student.....why did you write that??

  8. Not a reference at all to high school students in general, just to squeaky eared cheese eating ones. You know what I don't like? Anonymous commenters.