What's goin' on?

Time now for What's Goin' On....

Yeah, I really wanted to do that.  Folks around here my age might remember the late, great Eddie Driscoll, a local Bangor TV personality that did things like host a bit called "The Great Money Movie", where viewers watched and had to look for a clue to win a prize.  But it was fun just to watch Eddie!  He had this very lovable, quirky personality that made everyone giggle.  When the caller for TGMM got the right answer, you'd see 'ol Eddie pump his fist and go "wwwwWWWOOOO!"  And the commercials he did for "WLBZ TV, Channel 2, Bangor, Maine" were delightfully offbeat.  Good old Eddie is a gem that can't be replaced.  Anyway... what's goin' on?  I'm in bed here on a wee hours of a Friday morning with some Timely Health Care buzzing through me, so I thought why not.  I want to see if I can keep my blogs relatively lighthearted anyway.  Essentially they're just letters to me in the future.  And if you wanna see, here I am.

It's a wicked cold night tonight.  The skies are overcast with the odd snow squall, but the big deal is the temperatures... it's minus 14 C right now.  It's been years since we've had it this cold in December, that usually hits around mid January.  

So anyway, let's chat.

I just read that Scarlett Johansson is targeting being in "The Batman 2" after Emma Stone apparently didn't get the money she wanted.  I'm not really a fan of her stuff anyway.  I think she bungled the Gwen Stacy role in the "Amazing Spider Man" movies.  But she gets a lot of awards.  I keep getting her and Emma Watson mixed up.  Anyway... SJ is looking to get a piece of the back end deal in exchange for a lower salary.  And she really wants to do it.  I haven't seen her do anything interesting enough for me in a while, though.  She could use a pickup.  imo.

Star Trek, though..... I've thrown in the towel on the current version of it.  I know the JJ Abrams 'Trekverse is dead, thankfully.  After the movies underdid it with the fanbase, and the TV shows starting off strong and crashing so ugly that I had to stop watching it.  I get why younger folks like it.  I'm an old fart longing for the old Trek universe.  But Abrams was never a fan of Star Trek to begin with, and literally said he wanted to make it more like Star Wars.  Then look what he went and did to Star Wars.  Abrams is a great producer, but not director.  Arguably.  Like I say, it has its fans.  But anyway... next month the newest, and presumably last, of the current TV Trekverse will air its last series opener.  "Star Fleet Academy" is a nightmare for any legitimate Star Trek fan, y'all.  It looks like Trek 90210.  This is gonna be Paramount's "She Hulk" series.  UUUUggghh, don't get me started on "She Hulk"!!!  She been done wrong.

I've been reading that Marvel's upcoming "Avengers Doomsday" movie is going to have more practical effects.  Well, it's about tucking fime.  A lot of these movies look like the digital form of excrement, if you get me.  But I mean they really stuck the landing on "Endgame" though, right??  It made me respect every movie that led up to it.  Then this multiverse monstrosity hit.  With RDJ coming back to the fold for Doomsday, perhaps it's appropriately titled.  Ah, I'm excited about where they could be headed, though.  On my wish list:  There was a great Daredevil/Spiderman crossover called the Sin Eater series.  The story was that both were hunting to take down a serial killer who calls himself Sin Eater.  Spiderman and Daredevil actually had it out over how it should be handled.  Here's the thing, though.... Spiderman had the alien costume at the time, if I remember correctly, and the comic series "Peter Parker, the Spectacular Spider Man" for a time deemed him "all new, all daring", because possibly his alien simbiote, being his costume through this era, was influencing Parker's conscious decisions.  It's fascinating to look back on it, really.  A lot of comic book stuff is great actual art, both visually and literally.  Anyway, I think Tom Holland might steer the ship in that direction, after what I think will be his Spider Man switching universes to Daredevil's.  And man, am I in for that!  It makes sense, right?  Kingpin is in Daredevil's universe, and it just makes sense to have one of Spider Man's most enduring enemies finally cross paths.  This approach is a great way for Marvel to re-start, and maybe allow for artistic directors to take a swing at things.  There's a TON of great directors doing work for shows like Daredevil, Punisher, Jessica Jones, that I've seen.  All three of those series knocks it out of the park for me.  So it's not that I'm against Marvel.  But you can't please everybody either.  

We've been watching "The Orville" lately, just getting through the first of three seasons.  This show is a big, wet, sloppy kiss to Star Trek TNG fans in mostly the best ways.  I can not complain about this show at all because it nails everything with what must be a conservative budget.  Seth MacFarlane put this show out on TV for three seasons starting in '17.  I appreciated the nod to us Trek fans, which he's clearly a fan of.  There are nods to TNG all over the place, kind of making me wish this is where Trek would be right now.  With a whole lotta cheekiness thrown in, we're talking about Seth MF here, so expect it, right?  Ah, just the clear and obvious effort by everyone on this show to want to make it work is enough to make it shine like the crazy diamond it is.  God bless Seth - well, he's atheist I think, but he'll be okay - for giving us back what was taken from us:  a show that hilariously and wonderfully points at everyone and laughs, knowing you look just like them.  Norm MacDonald voices a digital character on the show and nails every gooey appearance he makes (NOT explaining...you'll have to watch it).  Poor Norm died in the middle of the show's run, sadly.  He was one of my most favorite ever comedians.  Lots of familiar faces and names, onscreen and off.  

So as it is, this is a lot later now as of this paragraph.  Now it's the wee hours of December 16 as of this point.

"Avatar: Fire and Ash" is out in a few days.  I think we'll reacquaint ourselves with the first two installments then go out and see it in IMAX.  Which isn't cheap, but Cameron always gives you your money's worth.  Fire and Ash is supposed to be the second part of "Way of Water", so it's supposed to feel like one big movie.  Like a reeeeealllly long Kill Bill.  I love long films that are worth it, but when a long movie turns into a turd, I get angry about it.  So me, I'll probably take a peek at Rotten Tomatoes if it seems risky.  But I trust only really a few directors.

Friday's coming down the barrel, and that's supposed to be the closest that 3 I Atlas comes to Earth.  And right now, between now and Christmas or something, things are supposed to happen.  Like historic things.  As if we need more of that this year, right?  But what if it turns out to be good?  I'm going to choose to believe that justice will prevail.  That can apply to a lot of things.

I imagine people I haven't talked to in a while might ask me what I think of KISS being enshrined in the Kennedy Center.  My answer is, I'm displeased, but what else am I supposed to be.  Does KISS want to be the band that turns such an honor away?  I suspect it would get them a lot more grief if they didn't go.  That doesn't mean I like it.  I still wish they turned it down.  Now they'll be known as that band that the pedophile president and attempted insurrectionist and adjudicated rapist inducted them in.  Welcome to the wrong side of history, KISS.  

I'm not done there either.  Ace Frehley passed away last month before he could attend the induction.  Ace was always bad for his equilibrium and balance ... I'm a member of that club.  But Ace had fallen in his studio, allegedly, and suffered a head injury from which he couldn't recover.  He's been sober for twenty years, because his daughter Monique asked him to take care of himself.  He did.  Then Gene Simmons goes and says in an interview with Monique nearby and insinuates Ace didn't get sober at all, and is dead now for it.  Like, WOW.  I've listened to and read Gene's stuff all my life, and this is the lowest I've heard him go.  This just might be the one thing his fans might not recover from.  And for the love of Pete, I wish he'd lose those monstrous sunglasses.  The higher the age gets, the creepier that looks.  

All that being said, I won't stop being a fan of what KISS was.  As for what KISS is, that's up for debate.

So hey, here's what I watch these days.  On TV even, YouTube.  

There's this young podcaster named Adam Mockler that has his own podcast, and the guy is admittedly Lefty.  But he's super smart, knowledgeable and is more than reasonable with his debates when he shows up on CNN.  He calls himself left-center, but make no mistake, he's quite progressive.  And that's fine by me.  We've seen what the extreme right can do to society... now let's give the far left (like Denmark's approach) a shot.

On the wild side, sort of, is Area 52 - which, as you might guess, is UFO/UAP related.  I'm choosy about what I watch when it comes to that stuff, though, and Chris Ramsay delivers a show with lots of thought and intellect involved, with credible and engaging guests.  This is escapist stuff, a take it or leave it type of channel, but Ramsay's delivery deserves respect for the options he allows to be spoken about.  Area 52 is one of my daily go-to favorites.

Everyone has their preference for news sources, but my choice is CBC - one of the few objective media sources out there.  Some would disagree.  But through the years, since CTV fired Lisa LaFlamme because she has gray hair, I explored other Canadian outlets.  CBC actually feels like Canada.

Meidas News has a few places to go, and one of the great Canadian ones would be Charlie Angus, himself a former gov't house member.  He does not mince words when it comes to what he thinks about MAGA or Trump's efforts to assimilate our country.  And he very much dishes on Polly Ever and why he shouldn't be in his current line of work.

Another spot-on podcaster in Canuckland is the Claus Kellerman POV show he has most days.  I like podcasts that are in the ten to twenty five minute range, so he usually hits the sweet spot.  And the guy knows his stuff.  I think he's left leaning, but he calls out liberals when they muck things up too.  Seems like a great guy to have a beer with.  I agree with his views most of the time, and respect the ones I disagree with.  

On the paranormal end I watch Steven Greer, whose approach to the UFO/UAP subject spans a lot more area than the surface.  Greer asserts that most sightings are actually man-made, and that real aliens may not be that at all, but inter-dimensional visitors.  He's got a lifetime of work behind him and retired as an ER doctor to take up this matter full time.  He has several documentaries out about his findings.  But I actually prefer his direct online content.

Another man you need to keep your eye on is Chris Bledsoe, a very faithful Christian man with actual values.  Over the last couple of decades, he's amassed quite a following, including government officials, and even was invited to the White House for dinner with President Obama.  His prophecy for Easter of '26 is tantalizing.  Oh... and this guy actually summons UFO's/UAP's at will.  This includes orb entities that seem to follow him wherever he goes.  Give his name a search in YouTube and explore what he says.  He brings a LOT of hope to a time when we desperately need it.

There's a channel for an outfit called Jubilee which is fascinating, especially when it posts a show called Surrounded, where twenty or so people sit in a circle around one knowledgeable and steadfast as they take turns to debate on topics set by the one.  Most times it's quite engaging.  Sometimes alarming.  A must-see would be Mehdi Hasan's appearance on Surrounded.  It's downright frightening.

My favorite place to go to on info about the Russian war against Ukraine is Jason Jay Smart's channel, where a man who's actually an advisor to the Ukraine defense department and journalist, reports on the successes of Ukraine's efforts in pushing back against Putin and his minions.  This is the biggest exposition of mainstream media you could look for.  I actually hate mainstream news now.  Even CBC has a lopsided view on the war in Russia's favor, but news organizations are out to sow and farm fear for business and repeat customers.  Something like this punches back at that notion.  And it's about time.  Look for the endings of some of his videos that includes Ukraine soldiers returning home to their families.  A lot of those will bring you to tears, in a nice way.

And a companion station to that might be U.S. citizen Professor Gerdes, who offers more of a good news/bad news scenario for more of a balanced look.  He's pretty objective about the stats he provides and makes no bones about his backing of Ukraine.  I make sure I watch videos like his and Smart's and leave 'likes' to support them in the algorithm, be as it may.

Secular Talk with Kyle Kulinski is another favorite, because he's very sharp and witty with a heavy dose of vulgarity and a splash of humor.  He's basically, to me anyway, a parody of the right wing fanatics which are out there in droves, but it seems he's actually possibly winning some over.  He backs up what he says and is remarkably indicting in his arguments.

Hey, let's break this list up a bit with something different.... Preppy Kitchen is a channel I subscribe to because this John Kanell guy makes a lot of stuff that a simple mind like mine can grasp onto.  Pretty nice everyday kitchen buddy stuff.

Boomshaklaka..... Stefan Burns' channel is immensely entertaining and educational as he teaches about astronomical and astrological science, alerting us to abnormalities that occur here and there and what to expect when it's time to deal with it, if it does.  And his earthquake and solar storm forecasts/ponders make you say 'hmm' while offering some smarts along the way.  His childlike glee that comes through when he's on is contagious and fun to hitch a ride on.  And the wife has a crush on him.  😋  I know I'm gonna catch hell for saying that.  

That'll just about do it for my recommendations at this point.  Let's put it this way... it's at the point where we told Bell that we just wanted internet and no cable, and they desperately offered us basically free TV to keep us.  We literally barely watch TV anymore.  We subscribe to YouTube, Prime, Netflix, Disney and we're all set.  A lot of money you say!  Okay.  But we hardly go out.  Going to a movie on the weekend with snacks with your significant other is approaching $100 now.  I'll take that cash and get a yearlong subscription online instead.

SO.... this is getting done late!  It is now January 11, 2026, and we have to go to the gym for back and shoulder day.  The holidays were forgettable as far as we're concerned, but we're right back on track.  Stylin' and High Vibin'.  

What about a video blog? 

Hmm...

It's Love

For a short time, I put "personal" or "opinion" or whatever at the top of my blog posts to give a hint of what the post is about.  Now I just think that's silly.  I don't have some big following or anything, but I connect with some folks here and there, and that's fine by me.  This page has been going for a long time.  I've looked back on some of the old posts and witnessed something, though, with the ones where I was talking about myself or somebody else.  What I observed was that guy was ME.  I wrote that stuff.  For better or worse.  Most times for one or the other.

So, that guy was indeed me that wrote those words, but that version of me doesn't exist anymore.  I must take full responsibility for my past musings, but disown many of those views today.  I continue to be kind of hard on myself, like everyone is from time to time, but man... these past couple of years were revelatory for me.

I've done, and continue to do, some deep diving on spirituality, and really, reality in general.  Something that I've learned to do most recently is to disconnect from social media (mostly, anyway... I'm still at BlueSky, and use Twitter for reference).  I imagine there are some who think that I might have "unfriended" them on Facebook or Instagram or Threads, but after finding myself getting drawn back into the fire on many issues, social and political, I asked myself if it was all worth it.  It is NOT.

As a patient of mental illness, which I have much under control these days, I have to consider what's best to improve myself and my outlook.  Not just for my sake.  There are people like my wife and daughter that have to deal with me frequently, and so I think I should work on making myself the best person that will fit in their lives and maybe make them better.  I know it all makes me much better. 

Getting away from the social media bubble has become a revelation for me.  A couple of months ago, I had a bit of a setback in my recovery, but rather than lay on the ground and brood over what got me there, I mustered the energy to get up quickly, apologize to anyone I may have pissed off - like my wife, who insists she's never upset with me - and attempt to deconstruct what happened to that I can remember the hole in this road I just ran into so I might dodge it the next time I'm there.  

I questioned my beliefs, outlook, surroundings, and most importantly, how each of them makes me feel as a person.  I kind of came to a conclusion that every interaction you have with someone is based on two major things:  Intention and Perception.  Someone throws what they think is an innocent joke your way.  The intention is for that person to make you laugh.  How it's received, the perception, is entirely, ENTIRELY up to you.  If the intention was to offend you, you can either ignore it, or laugh it off, like an arrow off a suit of armour.  In the show Game of Thrones, a character named Tyrion Lannister, played by the marvelous Peter Dinklage, he was continuously being called an imp and other colorful things relating to him being a dwarf person.  He would respond to them by telling them they were right... he's an imp, a tiny man, etc., and he was the best, most powerful imp or midget or whatever that they will ever have to deal with.  "Wear it like armour," he'd say, "and it can never be used against you".  

Thus, when people give their opinions, including myself, they're just like assholes.  Everyone has them.  Some of them stink more than others.  Some don't at all.  But it's subjective with each and every one of us.  Who cares what the collective thinks, though.  Some of us care too much.  I know I did.  But I do believe that opinions are best when they're backed up with facts.  And facts don't care about opinions.  They just are.  

On social media, it seems that people feel the need to vent their opinions.  And let's face it... everyone has a different one.  Some may be similar.  But I think we need to be careful on what kind of sources we base our views on.  Getting political only briefly here, millions of people continue to watch Fox News, even after they were actually successfully sued for nearly $800 million for lying on behalf of the far-right.  People continued to watch.  Integrity is apparently priceless to some.

The problem with social media is, that it lacks so much context.  That would be the biggest problem with it for me.  You're reading this, but you can't hear the sound or tonality of my voice.  You can't hear my expression.  You can't see the look on my face when I'm typing it in.  All of these particulars can make a world of difference in how something is perceived.  And depending on how positive or negative you feel at any given time, it can be misconstrued, sometimes sadly.  Lots of folks have lost friends through social media.  That happens far more than when you're face to face with someone.  Ultimately, context is everything.

I have been guilty of all of that through the years; relying too much on platforms that are actually built to make you feel a certain way to begin with, mostly not good.  Being a mental illness survivor, I don't really think I personally have any business being on it the way I was.  Words in the wind can potentially be a lot more forgettable than when they're online forever, and more easily repaired.  Depending on your outlook.  I suppose I continue to be guilty of it from time to time, but far, far less upon realizing this more.

These days, I focus on the vibe of things.  Really.  The vibe.  Everything is vibration, and the higher the frequency, the clearer and happier you are.  I've discovered this as I continue on my journey toward acceptance of life.  I monitor my intentions, and gauge my perceptions, for they will dictate how high my vibe is.  

My wife embarked on a journey at the beginning of the year to focus on one specific thing, Inflammation.  It's what all illness is.  Including the multitude of things she deals with.  She wanted to bring her weight down after beating E. Coli/Covid/Sepsis last year, and build her body back better to ward off all this stuff.  She's lost around 30 pounds and is still shrinking, while she continues to go to the gym with me regularly and doing lots and lots of walking.  Up to now, this year, she's walked around 1500 miles, as we have partaken in walking frequently, with what we've called 'pot walks', where we take our cannabis edibles and head out for two, three, four hour walks around town.  The THC component has a way of shutting out the bad and tremendously accenting the good.  You see things you don't normally see.  I don't mean hallucinating either, rather a filter is removed and it allows you to witness what was in front of you all along.  This is in our experience, and I know with countless others as well.  

We've taken to walking through Victoria Park here in Moncton almost every time we go for a walk in the summertime.  We discovered something early on that really made us feel blissful, without irony at all.  We'll start at one corner, across the street from our old dentist I went to for decades, and walk through acknowledging all the trees throughout the park.  There are lovely flower beds, benches, and a memorial for war vets set up where Remembrance Day ceremonies are held annually.  I know my Dad used to attend those.  Sometimes I'll ponder my Mom and Dad having been there many times.

We'd continue on through the park, marveling at the age of the mighty trees that have been there through the ages.  The stories they could tell!  They've seen generations come and go, and continue to welcome the newcomers.  They're alive.  That's a fact.  But their vibration is different from ours, so they witness life differently than we do.  But they see us.  They hear us.  They know us.  They continue to provide for us, unconditionally.  We are unabashed 'tree huggers'.  To do so actually brings grounding for our bodies and souls.  We don't actually hug them, because they're so huge, some of them.  But we stop to touch them and offer thanks.  We're talking to God, after all.  God is nature and love.  And God is nothing else.  We do not believe in a vengeful and jealous God.  God literally holds everything together.  Not unlike what King's X sings in "It's Love".  God is love.

As we continue on past the water fountain, which was dry this year because of a lingering water drought, people are sitting on the grass in the park, on the benches, and gathered all around in the grassy open, playing frisbee or ball or just playing, people of all colors, nationalities, religions, ethnic backgrounds, countries of origin, along with what once was a very 'white' city.  Now it's so colorful and radiant, and happy, ecstatic even!  In our elevated state, witnessing all this is absolutely intoxicating, to the point almost of joyful tears.  We make it a point to say hi to everyone, especially if they're of color, to make them feel welcome as possible.  What we didn't quite realize was what we were to get back from these fine folks.  Giant smiles, waves, gratitude, and just generally elevated, loving spirits.  It's something to be in the midst of, with a positive state of mind, to become a part of what is heaven on earth.  Heaven, to us, not being a place, but a state, emanating from the middle of the chest and spreading throughout the body.  Everyone there is so happy!  Who wouldn't want to be part of this?  We made it a point all summer of allowing ourselves to bask in this remarkable high of vibrations, letting it wash over us, adorning us with a glow that perhaps we'd been missing.  And it occurred to me... what if this really is what heaven is?  All of this diversity, all this love, all this acceptance.  It's what's sorely lacking in the U.S. right now.  They are not embracing this like we do.  Canada has work to do on acceptance, of course, but we're aware of it and most of us I think realize love overcomes all.  When you have acceptance and love and respect, you get all of this back in droves.  Canada is a happy place, generally.  So diverse, so forward looking.  In countries around the world where there is strife and conflict, you get the opposite.  In short... the vibe in Canada is very high.  Forget politics.  Forget whoever's opinion that crashed with yours.  Focus inward, love and forgive yourself and others, and spread it around.  It's very sweetly contagious.  

I would challenge anyone reading this who might be on social media to take a one month break from it.  Get outside instead.  Listen to your favorite music.  That's a big one... music can instantly rev up the vibe.  Be around people who make you happy, where you can be yourself.  Don't stay around any situation that brings down your vibe.  Also, alcohol is a depressant, and can be evil in excessive amounts.  Alcohol itself isn't evil, but never give it your steering wheel.  Doing all of this will change you if you find you're stuck in the cycle of criticism.

I do hope anyone who might read this finds some kind of solace within these turbulent times.  It is not hopeless, unless you say it is.  Love can save you.

And I wish you, indeed, much much love.

Without prejudice

There have been a few starts and stops regarding me posting a new entry here.  I have a few partially written blog posts in my draft folder that I gave up on for one reason or another.  A lot of times, I'll get a bit of writer's block or just lose interest; not in writing the blog or its contents, but just a lack of desire to get my words out there.

Now that I'm generally off social media, in particular anything Meta, I've found it a bit easier to gather my thoughts on certain issues that I'd previously shunned.  With what I'm about to post in this particular entry, I expect to ruffle some feathers - unintentionally, I might add - and perhaps clear a few things up.  My intention is not to rile anyone.  I need to make that clear.  Where's that get you anyway.

Let me get into why I, at the very least temporarily, dropped most social media.  

The state of the world right now has not been worse since the last World War.  I'd love to know what Mom and Dad think of what's going on in the States (I refuse to refer to them as the United States, as today they're anything but "united").  A conservative pundit with a long history of hate speech was killed recently.  I'm not one of the crazy jackasses who celebrated this, though I don't think there are as many of those people as we may have been led to believe.  

But the religious far-right has spread like a cancer rapidly since the current States' president was sworn in this past January.  I've not ever seen a political figure, or figures in this case, induce more hatred via religion and partisanship in my life in the so-called free world.  Some of this hatred genuinely irks me more than it has in the past.

DEI.... Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion.  I don't understand how this is a problem.  It was working, for the most part, from what I've witnessed.  It isn't perfect.  It's a policy that needs constant refining, like everything else, and needs time to evolve to reach adequate efficacy.  Considering the diversity of the States, namely I would think in the urban and coastal regions, I think it's only fair that there is a boost to those who are part of minorities that contribute to society (IMMIGRANTS) that they get some kind of representation.  Let's face it... the States have a long, ugly history of oppression and whitewashing.  Anyone seen as different, especially if they're multiplying in numbers harmlessly, has become a target in the modern-day States.  Rather than learn from minorities, too many have chosen to attempt to keep them from offering their voices to what should be a blossoming palette of culture.  Canada is showing them how this is reached.  We have our own history, of course, which I like to think we have learned from.  At least until the MAGA wing of politics overcomes our Conservative Party and Americanizes them, which is currently being attempted.  I honestly don't believe it would have gotten this bad with the Progressive Conservatives, which dropped its "progressive" moniker once the Reform Party from the west merged with what was left of the PCs at the time.  

But whatever happens in the States all too often tends to wind up happening here in Canada.  And I have serious issues with some of this.

I offer a personal story of my own to elaborate.  

My daughter has been seeing her boyfriend from all the way back in high school for a number of years now.  They are grown adults today still trying to find their place in the world.  Work, or 'the big career jobs' that we all want to get us through life, has evaded them, for the most part.  Hell, it evaded me all of my own life. He's shuffled through jobs, but managed to still be gainfully employed.  She has too.  She works for Janice at the post office kiosk Janice manages.  

Nearly two years ago in November, the four of us traveled to Montreal to see the KISS End of the Road Tour at the Bell Center.  Through the years, we've noticed the steady progression of evidence indicating gender fluidity in our kid's boyfriend's appearance.  He chose to wear makeup - not the KISS kind of makeup - to the show.  There was certainly a feminine slant to his appearance that was noticeable to Janice and me, but we didn't think much of it.

Fast forward to the drive home after the show.  We got home and dropped off the kids at their apartment and went home ourselves.  A discussion via messenger took place with Janice where it was revealed to her, and me, that he was coming out as trans.  We were shocked!  In retrospect, we should have seen it coming.  All the signs had been there.  Our daughter was fine with it.  We responded at the time with the assurance of "the God we believe in loves Everyone."  

Except, once it began to sink in, it screwed with my head a lot.  I didn't eat or drink anything for three days.  I was in bed that whole time and didn't/couldn't get up.  It all made me think that I wasn't going to have a conventional future with our kid, and I just didn't know if I could cope with it.  

Over the years, I'd gotten more and more accustomed to the idea of becoming accepting (NOT "tolerant") of the gay community.  I thought I pretty much fit in with the liberal side of society on the live and let live tropes that so many of us allege to subscribe to.  Well, this was a test.

Nicole was now the name of our daughter's partner, formerly Cole.  

This thrust me into a place where my openness to such relationships was to be put on trial in the present day going forward.  I did decide to make an effort to understand it all.  Except, there was nothing to actually understand, as much as accept and embrace.

In my recent spiritual awakening, what I've come to realize is that religion is generally a scam built around money.  There are numerous factions in the form of 'faiths' that all seem to say that only through them can you get to Heaven.  Each thinks there's something wrong with the other.  Generally, Christian religions respect one another, but there are extremist our-way-or-the-highway-to-hell types that are relentlessly persecuting in their beliefs, all based on separate theologies of different interpretations from scriptures that inevitably got lost in translation, literally, from the original texts, which had a limited vocabulary in those days to begin with, leaving interpretation wide open to subjective malleability.  Much of the texts of the Bible omit several gospels to conform to different ideologies, which in turn, of course, leads to conflict among those with different beliefs based on biblical scriptures.  

It's my own belief that our own recorded history under-reports details of how society treated women, in particular, before biblical times.  From what I've seen and read, women were revered and respected far more than the patriarchal days of the Old and New Testaments, in particular though, the Old.  In my opinion, Jesus was sent to us to teach us to refine how we treat each other.  I believe he tried to teach us to find Heaven within ourselves.  It's not a physical place we go to.  But by learning to love each other, we gain more recognition with what we call God.

And who, or what, is God, really?  Well, the Bible tells us.  But is the Bible God's word, or is it man's interpretation of God's word?  Did we muck it up at all if that's the case?  Surely not.  Man is perfect, after all.  Oh wait, God is the one who's perfect.  These scriptures were penned by human hands.  

Among the translations that changed along the way were God actually having... GASP!.... pronouns.  He/Him/His, etc.  

Here's my problem with that... in my opinion, from numerous accounts of the afterlife that I've been reading, the ego dies with the body upon death.  Imagine that.  Imagine not having an ego.  Nothing to be proud of, nothing to be offended at or with, nothing to be mad or sad about, no jealousy, etc.  To me, that's the definition of bliss, of ecstasy.  Pure love and happiness.  What a thought!  That is, indeed, Heaven, or at least part of what it is.

Now, imagine a spirit with ego.  In the Old Testament in particular, God seems to have an out of control ego, at least as I interpret it from the King James version of the Bible.  Attached to the ego has to be gender representation.  God is referred to as a male entity.  Meaning God has a penis.  It's how we refer to men and women, generally.  And if we were created in God's own image, and God doesn't have a vagina (I am not trying to be smart here, either), then what's the purpose of God being male or female?

In my view, God is neither male nor female.  God is God.  God is Love, and love binds everything together.  A lack of love finds hate within its proximity.  Hate comes in many forms, I think.  Intolerance, jealousy, pride, envy, etc.  Anything that is antithetical to joy and happiness.  Hate exists in the absence of Love.  

Therefore, if God has no gender and is not bound by earthly limitations like ego, competitiveness and sex drive, then all there is left is love.  Enlightenment is what happens when there is nothing left of us but that.  I believe when our bodies pass away, we finally escape the confines of our physical bodies.  What happens for us to atone for our earthly 'sins' is another matter that I have ideas of that's another conversation.  

Our earthbound bodies harbor our spirits like avatars.  When those avatars have outlived their purpose and usefulness, we're left with our souls.  We don't take our penises and vaginas with us, or anything else from our confining bodies.  No jostling for the favor of the opposite sex or any sex, for that matter.  No desire to be better than anyone else.  Just be YOU, and love each other for it, unconditionally.

So, how are we to assume that the souls that each of our bodies carries should be assigned to one type or another?  In spirit, such boundaries are dropped.  Why should these boundaries be recognized in our physical existence?  If we are indeed spirit embodying solid form, why do we need to limit our love to what we see here on the physical plane?

Coming to the realization of all this made me rethink everything.  I am a human being with an ego that is subject to the whims of all the trappings of humanity, like every other person here on this planet.  And I have absolutely no right to judge how anyone chooses to express their true spirit.  If love surfaces in a form that the human eyes have difficulty to comprehend, to me that's an opportunity for spiritual growth of my own; to see beyond what my eyes see, and what I've been trained all my life right from the cradle to believe and accept as fact, when all along it's all really just based on wide-ranging theologies with various interpretations. 

It's not just Nicole that I've had to evolve to respect.  I have family members and friends who are also.  Accepting the homosexual wing of society took more effort than I first realized, but to my credit, I think I just about have it figured out.  The trick is to stop fighting it.  I'm a straight man who sees gay love as exactly the same as straight love or anything else like it.  And the absence of love brings the opposite, and I don't wish to be a part of that anymore.  It took some learning and understanding, and a whole lot less of "what about"isms.  The goal posts for love are a wide open net for all, and all it requires is surrender - letting it be what it is.  I'm talking about TRUE love, not lust.  Real love exists even in lust's absence.  Real love lies in embracing one another especially in times of trial.  And forgiveness also kills hatred and intolerance.  

This brings me back to my stance on social media today.  I witness, very sadly, too many friends and acquaintances on all platforms from people dear to me getting caught up in the hateful net of bigotry, self-aggrandizing and holier-than-thou-ness.  I'm guilty of it too.  Having spent time away from it all, I see the disease it can actually become.  I see friends and relatives embracing the likes of far-right personalities, all while people they know and love who live a lifestyle they choose look on and then wonder if they can be in the same space anymore.  How enormously sad that is, the more I think about it.  It's apartheid, or wannabe apartheid.  The more we separate and compartmentalize each other by color, gender, race, etc., the more detached we become from one another; perfect breeding grounds for hatred and separation.

Well, that's not an acceptable world to be living in.  And I won't have any part in it.  

Now that Nicole is "out", and pursuing a career in the Canadian army where she won't get passed over because of orientation or gender, I need my own friends and family to be accepting the way my wife and I are.  I do love my daughter and I love her partner, without condition or premise.  They are two loving souls that have gravitated to one another unencumbered by their genders.  I also have family who are members of the gay community.  Should they be reading this, I want to thank them for having the patience to stand by while I continued to grow to understand them.  I think it took too long.  But also, I am the product of this cultivated environment.  Just like each and every other one of us.  I forgive myself for my ignorance, now that I can see it in retrospect.

And for anyone who defends the hateful rhetoric of the far-right and their stubbornness to try to force those unlike them to conform, I need to affirm that I stand with my gay-plus friends and family, known and unknown, and ask that you be mindful of who and what you support with them in mind.  

Let them teach you like they did me.... teach you how to love without prejudice.