Thursday, December 28, 2023

Personal Blog: One Last KISS Goodbye

Time to close out the year.  

It's the wee hours of December 28 at the time I write this, as we're staring down the barrel of the New Year.  Every year is interesting, each with its own highs and lows.  Generally, the year's been pretty good.  The fact is, that anything crappy that happens usually bears fruit eventually that brings us into better times.  That's something to keep in mind, specifically when things get rough.

On a personal note... actually this whole blog entry is personal... the last couple of months has been less than great.  The wife's health has presented its share of challenges for her, but she's bounced back from all of it, as she always does.  When (if?) I grow up I hope I get to be as tough as she is.

November 18 was the pinnacle date of the year, kind of, in that we would see KISS for the last time in Montreal with our daughter and her man.  We took off on Friday the seventeenth for Quebec, driving through what would be quite a challenging ride at times, with heavy rain hampering the road conditions.  Generally, though, it was an uneventful trek.  We got there in around nine hours, in spite of the bad weather.  I drove all the way there and then back on Sunday when we left.  When we got to the motel that we'd booked online on Friday night, it was far from overwhelming, but perhaps adequate.  It wound up being a rather sleazy, seedy place in an older part of Montreal, but the room for four adequately enough housed us for the weekend.  It was close enough to the Bell Centre where the show was going to be, maybe a 45 minute walking distance if we'd chosen to do that, which we did.  We thought we'd walk so we could see some of the sights a bit of downtown Montreal.

I remember telling the kids that they'll love Montreal.  We'd seen a few shows there, and the crowd was always raucous and the people gracious and friendly.  Last time we were there for a show was in '05 for the U2 Vertigo Tour, which broke all the records at the time.  We'd seen KISS a couple of times before that.  Every time we'd go, the concert was like a huge party among 18,000 friends.  Janice and me were pretty excited to experience it all again, and to let the kids experience what we did.

It was an odd time for the KISS End of the Road Tour to be winding down, with only two weeks of shows left after this.  The band was to play Quebec City, Ottawa and then Toronto after Montreal.  Thank God we were going to see this.  As anyone who knows me realizes, we were robbed of our opportunity to see this show in Bangor in '20 because the borders closed because of Covid, and Ticketmaster refused to refund our tickets.  So we were out over $400.  Surely we wouldn't get screwed out of seeing this tour again.  Right?

We left the motel around noon-ish, and began our trek on foot for the Bell Centre area.  Montreal is loaded with little shops and boutiques, something for just about everyone.  I'd never seen so many Tesla cars in one place.  You can barely hear those cars when they drive by.  But something seemed different about the city this time.  The people seemed a bit more tense and impatient.  The stores we went into offered less than subpar service.  In fact, one of the only smiles I'd seen was when I stopped to give a homeless man a few dollars.  The vibe in the air was certainly different from times gone by, bearing in mind that it's been eighteen years since we've been there.  But a lot can change in a year... let alone 18.

We had to navigate around long protest marches that were going on in favor of the Palestinians in the Israel/Gaza war.  Lots of cops around keeping things in order.  It was a peaceful protest, though in my opinion pointless.  Nothing these protesters did was going to change anything that was going to happen half a world away from us.  

Ultimately, we settled into a little basement bar downtown - the name of which escapes me at the moment - drawn in by the KISS music that was blaring from their speakers beckoning the likes of ourselves to come in and have a bite.  We did just that.  The people were all KISS fans in there, some wearing makeup and costumes even.  Yet I just didn't get that friendly buzz that we used to get.  Don't get me wrong, everyone was well behaved, but that brotherly feeling amongst everyone was kind of lacking like it was in the past.  Even the servers were kind of cold.  But the food was great.  Janice and me ordered our usuals; she got her Club Sandwich and I got my fish & chips.  I forget what the kids got, but we all enjoyed what we had; though Alexandra wasn't feeling totally great, thanks to Tom.  Cole had an eye on her.  He'd just gotten over a bad bout of norovirus prior to the trip.  We had our meal and we were off to the streets hovering around the Bell Centre until showtime.  The air was quite chilly, so we stopped into a shop where I bought a toque.  We also stopped into a Tim Horton's, where we sipped our beverages to bide the time away.  

To the venue we go, with the throngs of KISS fans - you'd know them when you saw them - descended upon the arena.  I was a bit nervous about the tickets being on my phone, worrying about connectivity issues, but those fears were unfounded as we were quickly admitted when our turn came.  We checked out the merch table, which had a monster lineup of fans waiting to snap up the various items being offered.  Janice really wanted the hoodie they had, but someone had bought the last one just before she could reach it.  And that last one went to Alexandra.  No worries, we can just get one for her online, and probably cheaper, since the venue tacks on their own fees for selling the merch.

Then it was time to take our seats.  It was then that I realize we'd gotten the shittiest tickets for a KISS show ever.  The stage was massive, but in an arena of that size from the balcony, it seemed smaller than it was.  It was the biggest stage production KISS had ever put on, and it showed; but from our vantage point, we didn't get to see it head-on as if we had seats in the bowl.  The seats themselves were cramped and tight.  And it seemed that the show was standing room only in the whole arena except for the section we were in.  Janice and me were the only ones standing and screaming in our section at times, and the guy sitting next to Cole was being a complete dick with his man-spread seating.  Some kid in front of us was busy recording the whole concert on his phone not even interacting with the show.  And some big goof behind us dressed up as The Demon poked at Janice telling her to sit down as Paul Stanley flew to our area of the venue.  "I got boots that make me nine feet tall!  I can't stand up!"  Well you should've thought about that beforehand going to a KISS show then, shouldn't ya, cupcake?  He muttered something in French and Janice turned and barked at him, "ENGLISH."  It didn't get much better.  Somebody else in our section threw a full glass of beer at that same guy but wound up dousing us, too.  All said, it was the worst crowd experience I'd ever had at a KISS show.

But as far as the concert goes, it was a wild one.  Lots of fire, bombs, effects, confetti, even balloons filled the air at various points of the show.  Gene and Tommy (band members) got on lifts that took them overhead midway through the arena.  Paul, as I said earlier, flew to our part of the building for a few songs.  Lasers galore.  The video screens made sure that even seats like ours could get a good view of the band, which was nice.  Eric's drums rose a couple of times - each guy got their own solo spot, specifically designed to give the rest of the band a breather from the more than two hour set.  Gene didn't fly to the ceiling this time though, opting instead for a lift that brought him up, probably for stability purposes.  Not to mention The Demon's not getting any younger, in his mid 70s.  He did the whole breathing fire/blood spitting thing, complete with probably the most evil looking imagery even by Gene's standards.  The band was TIGHT.  I'm not sure if they've ever sounded better, but KISS has always sounded great to me live.  I neglected to mention that the opening band, Crown Lands - a two-piece outfit - was quite good, to me reminiscent of earlier Rush, and they were given a ridiculous amount of stage room and lights, and the sound for them was as good as KISS' was.  KISS has never been about trying to show up an opening band.  In fact they'd help them however they could.  But back to KISS.... it was pretty cool also seeing Sam, finally, make the stage.  Sam is the giant serpent on
Gene's side of the stage that would blow smoke at various points of the show.  There's not much for me to say about the stage pods - giant octagonal light rigs, probably over a dozen of them, that rose and descended at various times of the show, with all different colors and imagery on their video screens.  I say not much to say, because from our point of view, we only really saw them from the edges instead of face-on.  By the time the encores came around, we all knew we were going to see the guys playing 'Rock and Roll All Night' for the last time, and the crowd was bonkers for the umpteenth sing-along.  This audience, I have to say though, is not the same audience we're used to witnessing in Montreal.  Loud and boisterous, yes, but Montreal usually went beyond that.  This isn't limited to the people in the venue.  We got this same vibe from everyone in the city.  Perhaps the air was tense from the demonstrations - or perhaps it's the population explosion of Montreal.  The Quebec government isn't a favorite in the polls these days, with a lot of segregation issues and terrible linguistic policies that make it often less than welcoming.  I know that we four didn't exactly feel the love from Montreal this trip.

The show got over, we left for the streets to hail down a cab back to the motel.  Pretty cheap, really, $25 got the four of us back.  We had a bite to eat, with probably the worst Big Mac I've ever had that seemed like it was assembled by a blind man with half a pint of sauce.  One gas station I went to to try to get a pack of Tums, I was met with an attendant who didn't understand a lick of English and he just looked at me like I was an alien, so I said 'nevermind' and moved on.  That's generally the reception we got from this trip.  We got up the next morning and didn't waste a whole lot of time packing up and getting back on the road home.  

And the road home was pretty good.  Another nine hour drive, uneventful, with the weather being far better except for the odd snow squall.  We got home early Sunday evening, leaving us lots of time to unwind before we would all be home to decompress from the trip.  All in all, this wasn't a great experience.  We took in the show, which was the best part of everything of course, but I will say that we won't be going back to Montreal anytime soon for any reason.  In fact, now that KISS is done, I don't know that we'll hit the road for any show now.  I certainly won't accept nosebleed seats for a concert ever again, either.  Still, Alexandra and Cole say they really enjoyed themselves, aside from various issues I already mentioned, and they were appreciative of all of it.  It was actually a Christmas/birthday present for Alexandra.  We paid for pretty much everything for them and were delighted to.

The following three days were something else.  I was still recovering from nearly 20 hours of driving over three days when I took a bit of a bad trip with one of my cannabis oil doses, thinking that it would brighten my mood a little, but the opposite happened, not necessarily because of the oil.  I was in bed for three straight days without eating or drinking anything.  Literally.  Not a drop of water or a crumb.  There are other reasons I was spiraling that I can't get into here.  I finally came around a bit Thursday that week, but would need a lot longer to recover.

Alexandra didn't fare so well.  Upon returning, shortly after she wound up with her own bout of norovirus.  Come to find out, after the KISS show in Montreal, they went to Quebec City, but then had to cancel the next three shows because of Paul Stanley getting sick from what appeared to be the same vicious virus.  He even said he wondered if it might be 'his time', he was that sick.  So this norovirus is a particularly harsh one, not that it's ever a picnic.  But that's how close we were to missing this show, again.  Man would I have been upset!

A couple of weeks ago, I decided to get some things done that were gnawing at me.  I needed to get a couple of remote starters for the car, because the ones we had for the last 13 years kind of bit the biscuit.  Plus there was a chip in the windshield that we took on our Montreal trip that I had to get repaired, which wound up spreading, and we don't have comprehensive insurance on our vehicle, to that set us back $400.  I had to get my license renewed too, another hundred or so dollars.  Needless to say, this made us have to scrimp when it came to Christmas.  But, such is life.  No one gets a free ride.

I remember the day I got all that done, we thought we'd celebrate a bit and get stuffed cheesy bread and pasta from Domino's.  When I came back from picking up the order, I found Janice in the bathroom being sick.  So yes, Janice's number was called for the norovirus and now it was her turn.  Boy, was she sick.  Scary sick.  I'd never seen her that sick from a stomach virus before, and it just wasn't letting up.  She spent a whole day running to the bathroom with it coming out of both ends.  It was so sad and upsetting that it made me cry.  I did what I could for her, tucking her in, rubbing her head, doting on any of her needs.  It was crushing to witness - the person I love the most being so ill.  She goes through enough with the illnesses she has without having to deal with this.  And again, this isn't just any stomach virus.  This one was particularly vicious.  I read up on some things about this bug going around, and apparently it's pretty widespread.  I even Googled if there'd ever be a cure or better treatment for norovirus.  Come to my surprise, they are actually making headway on an eventual vaccine for this, though it's probably a few years away.  I thought maybe I'd take some kind of preventative measure if I could.  I read that oil of oregano is shown to be at least somewhat effective against stomach bugs.  When I went to the store to get Janice supplies for her pending BRAT diet, I picked up a bottle of oregano oil capsules.  I took one when I got home.  Janice finally seemed to be settling down, though recovery would take days.

But wait, there's more!

When I woke up late Friday morning, I went to the bathroom and, boom, it was my turn.  I mounted the porcelain throne and grabbed the wastebasket, and the room started spinning.  My God, there's nothing worse in the world to me than puking.  I've written about it before here, that when I was young, up until I was about ten or eleven, I was sick almost every Christmas.  A couple of times I was so sick that I couldn't hardly move.  My brother Pete would attest to that, because I remember him carrying me to the bathroom so I could do my business.  Memories of all those times stuck with me, and I've never been able to calm down while being sick since, so I gasp and choke for air and panic.  Janice and me both think I have PTSD from those wild vomiting days when I was young.  Alas.... in this particular instance, I didn't throw up.  I felt like I was going to, but I didn't.  This made me wonder if that oregano oil actually had an effect on the virus in my stomach.  My gut, though, different story.  It came out of me like a firehose, as Janice put it.  So much, and so bad, in fact, that when I stood up to clean myself off, ... let's just say the next thing I remember I was hearing "Michael!  Michael!  MIKE!"  I lifted my head to find myself on the bathroom floor, having lost consciousness and cracked my head on a couple of things on the way to the floor.  Janice was beside herself.  I re-mounted the throne and let it rip some more.  Janice.... God love her.... cleaned me up and helped me back to bed.  I was white as a sheet and sweating like a racehorse, she said.  Of course, that wasn't the end of it.  About an hour later, I hobbled back to the bathroom and took a seat - more firehose-worthy dumpage ensued.  This time Janice had her eye on me, pride be damned.  I once again stood up to clean myself off, and once again down I went, out cold, cracking my right side on the bathtub on the way down.  Janice woke me up again, prying me off of the bathtub, once again cleaning me off.  I was out cold so I was dead weight until I came to after a couple of minutes.  The thing that bothers me the most about all of this is how this must look to Janice.  We both love and care about each other so much that it's quite distressing when one of us sees the other in this kind of shape.  I had to go back to the bathroom a few more times, but it was uneventful, and I just had the runs.  So even though I didn't throw up, it was as if I had.  Come to find out, upon me investigating, there really is a phobia about being sick like that. I have never had an easy time being sick - I can handle a cold or even a flu, even Covid, but not a cursed stomach virus.  My life is literally in danger now if I have to deal with that, to the point that Janice wants to be near if it happens, because the last three times now, I've blacked out and fainted, and twice gotten head injuries over it.  This time, I wound up with three goose eggs on my noggin from collapsing.  Even right now I can feel them.  And on this particular occasion, I actually cracked a rib on the bathtub.  We even worried there might be a floating rib from this, but I got x-rayed and the crack is indeed there, but no floaters.  Thank God.  But now I have the next month-plus to get over this rib injury.  Just what is it with me and rib injuries, I have no flippin' idea.

To add icing to that cake, I wound up with a monster sinus headache that lasted well over a day, bad enough to make sunlight a dire enemy.  I'm prone to these often, so I have Sudafed Advance to ward these headaches off, very successfully.  I used to lose a few work days due to those.  But thankfully I found S/A and was able to take care of it.  Here's the thing, though.... there's a shortage everywhere of this particular med.  So I didn't have it this time and had to ride it out.  And man, that was a long 24-36 hours.  Excruciating at times.  But I got through it.

So for anyone reading this thinking I'm one of those man-babies when he gets sick, you're right.... kind of.  Only when I have to be sick to my stomach.  And it stems from childhood trauma.  It makes me shudder to think of what might've happened had Janice not been around when all this happened to me. 

I've read that cognitive behavioral therapy can help this a great deal, but alas, I've been seeking that for my mental illness since forever.  I'm convinced there is no help for me and that I'm on my own.  I actually need help in that area now more than ever, but it just isn't there for me.  My cries for help fall on deaf ears of professionals.  Knowing this just makes me even more down.  I feel like I'm quite literally on my own.

Anyway, Christmas indeed wound up being super low key.  I like to read for mass at church at Christmas time, but I had to tell them I couldn't because of all this kerfuffle.  So I've basically been housebound for the last four or five days.  Janice seems to be mostly recovered, thankfully, as she has work and all.  I'm much better now, but still in recovery of sorts.  All this being connected to the PTSD thing, it plays on my mind as much as it does my body.  At least digestively, things appear to be nearly better.  And the goose eggs have shrunk.  The thought of a potential concussion isn't lost on me either.  Like I need more of those!

What we've decided to do about Christmas dinner is put it off until New Year's Eve and have the kids over then.  We were just in no shape at all to do it over the actual Christmas holidays.  The bright side of it all is, we got through it.  That virus is behind us now, and we're a bit stronger because of it.

Also, it was my birthday on the 26th, and though I don't post hardly at all on facebook, I do appreciate the birthday wishes.  If you're one of those folks and you're reading this, thank you.

I'd like to thank my friend Wayne for checking in on me, too.  A little thoughtfulness can go a long way.  I think he realizes that.

This will likely be my last blog entry for the year.  What a way to go out, eh?  Frig.

I hope you had a great holiday, and that you have a great New Year's to go with it.  Stay safe and love and care for each other.




Friday, November 17, 2023

Personal Blog: KISS Was There

KISS was there when Dad died in February, 1978.

KISS was there when my friend Darren introduced me to you with "Destroyer".  Then I wore out my brother Rick's "KISS Alive!" 8 track.

KISS was there when I got hit in the forehead by a man's line drive baseball and suffered a concussion.

KISS was there when I needed to get into real rock and roll.  So was Jim Rice and the Red Sox.  KISS had lots of releases around this period and made for the best distraction at the worst of times.

KISS made me pick up drumsticks made of an old wooden broom handle to play on cardboard boxes and pots and pans.  My brother Greg then bought me a drumset and even gifted me lots of KISS records.

KISS was there when I met my buddy Larry in grade seven, and we bonded over our fandom for KISS and learned our skills as a guitar player and drummer.  He's a good friend to this day.

KISS was there when I had trouble in school, with what I know now was a learning disability. 
 'Dynasty' was my record of choice when I was down in the dumps.

KISS was there with a new album out for me to decompress from life with.  "Unmasked" was on the turntable for months.

KISS was there when I nearly gave up drums, but heard Eric Carr and just kept playing even harder.  "Creatures of the Night" literally changed my life.  Carr is tattooed on my left arm.

KISS was there when I failed in school and was tempted to give up.  They said Don't.  After all, they didn't, after they released "The Elder".  And 'I believe in ME'.

KISS was there when people made fun of my complicated acne and girls stayed away.  The asskicker album "Lick It Up" made me smile when I thought I'd lost it.  "Animalize" would do the same.

KISS was there when as a teen I needed positivity to balance out the negative. "Asylum" would energize me.

KISS was there when I was getting beaten up at school for liking them - they said GET UP.

KISS was there when when I was hit by a car three times in the early 80s, and fought through serious concussion issues.

KISS was there to keep me cheery with my Mom, who needed someone to make her laugh in the years after Dad passed.

KISS was there when friends came and went and I felt like I was alone.

KISS was there when I finally got a girlfriend.  'Creatures' is the soundtrack for that time for me.

KISS was there when I met my first serious girlfriend, Michelle - I scrawled "KISS Lick It Up!" on my desk in grade 11.  A girl replied and wrote "It's only right, now!"  And we got together and went out for seven years, and she's still a great friend today.

KISS was there when I endured a bleeding ulcer that could have killed me.  They had lots of video releases that kept my imagination busy.

KISS was there when I contemplated suicide, a result of so many head injuries and a lack of knowledge back then about how to treat them.  Hearing any KISS album helped fix this.

KISS was there when I failed grade 12 and couldn't graduate with my girlfriend.

KISS was there when I got my first job in '84 (worked there for seven years), and I rattled the store windows on the night shifts with my KISS CDs and tapes - they kept me awake!

KISS was there when I bonded with another good friend Pete over KISS fandom.  We then formed various jam bands and played their songs.

KISS was there when I convinced my band at the time, Asylum, to play "Love Gun" and "Rock and Roll All Night", and even got crowds singing along with us, thanks to another great friend, Wayne, another friend I met through KISS interest.

KISS was there, at Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto on the 'Crazy Nights' tour, when three friends and me took a torturous train ride from Moncton to Toronto, barely slept, and tore our voices out screaming along with KISS.  

KISS was there in Toronto with Whitesnake and blew the 'snake away, even without the HITS stage.

KISS was there when I took my first jaunt to the U.S. and saw them in Old Orchard Beach, Maine, with three great friends.  It would so sadly be the last time I saw my hero, Eric Carr.

KISS was there when my Mom took ill with dementia.  I stayed home and didn't move out until she had to go.  KISS music was a way of assuring that it'll be alright.  Their "Revenge" record was their saying to everyone who said 'they're done' and giving them a huge middle finger.

KISS was there when I broke my foot and lost my job, my girl, my grandmother, and eventually, another job.  They just kept releasing albums, giving me the exit ramp away from stress.

KISS was there when I began to date my wife Janice, with whom we bonded over "God Gave Rock and Roll To You II" - She heard the harmonies and has been a fan ever since.

KISS was there when my wife and great friend Steve (God rest his soul) saw the 'Revenge' tour in Toronto, after driving for 16 hours to get there, and they were at MuchMusic studios with a throng of us looking in from outside and nearly shattered the windows.  Gene points up and says, "Moncton!"

KISS was there when I lost my job and couldn't get another for three years, even after going back to college.  You can't listen to KISS and not get your mood up.

KISS was there when my girlfriend (wife to be) Janice would bear our one and only child, Alexandra, who has been a fan literally since day one.  Born into 'The Army'.

KISS was there with 'Unplugged' and 'Carnival of Souls', to help me keep the faith with rock and roll when it was dying.

KISS was there for us all when they announced the reunion tour.  I saw it with my friends Tim and Pete and Al.  It was a magical time.  I got my job for the next 11 years as a driver at the same time.

KISS was there for me when Mom died of her disease.  I remember her saying one time, "do you think Gene Simmons would sing "When You Wish Upon A Star" at my funeral?"  Now it's all I associate that song with: My Mom's love for it.

KISS was there for my wife and me when we got married, and the honeymoon was the 'Psycho Circus' tour.  Our song, of course, is "Forever".  She proposed to me, so I sprung the surprise wedding on her.

KISS was there in Montreal when we took in 'The Farewell Tour' (really farewell to members Ace and Peter).  It was a fantastic but bittersweet show.  

KISS was there through the '00s, even if they didn't release new stuff.  If something's wrong, get your KISS records out and shout it out loud.

KISS was there in Halifax my wife and daughter went there to see KISS in front of 30,000 fans.  
We saw them in Mansfield, MA on the 'Sonic Boom' tour.  We saw them in Saint John, New Brunswick and again in Halifax for the 'Monster' album two nights in a row.  
KISS was there when Steve died in '15.  Steve was such a die hard fan that he requested 'Black Diamond' be played at his funeral.  It was strangely moving.

And we will be there, Janice my wife, Alexandra my daughter, and her boyfriend Cole for KISS November 18 in Montreal on the 'End of the Road' tour, all the way from Moncton.  They will end it on December 2 in New York.

Thank you, KISS, for having my back throughout my life.




Saturday, November 11, 2023

Opinion: About face

As the last week begins before we take off for Montreal for the last KISS show we'll ever see, I thought it might be time to talk a bit here about what's been going on.

Given that I've at least temporarily given up on facebook, I have not indeed given up on my blog page, where I feel better about talking about myself than on social media.  I thought I'd give an explanation for my absence there, for anyone who might care at all - and I should stress it doesn't matter if you don't.

Here's the thing about facebook for me:  I thought I'd give it an extended break and see how it affects my general view, where it's commonly noted these days that getting away from it improves one's outlook.  I'm here to tell you that this is all true.  

I keep my facebook messenger open, though, for anyone who wants to contact me that way.  Though I still have to field the odd joke or forward like traditional e-mail.  I'm not a fan of that stuff, if I'm being honest.  I would rather messenger be a more personal space for discussion.  I don't want to put anyone off about my stance on this either - I'm not doing this to offend anybody at all.

But I am doing it as a part of my effort to attain a good level of self-care via my own mental health.  I've taken a few steps back from facebook and Instagram and realized just how vain those places can be.  And I've been a part of that!  Not proclaiming innocence, here.  In fact, I look back on a lot of my activity on social media over the years and cringe at some of the things I've said and posted.  Even recently.

It's occurred to me that we don't need to put our views on politics on full display for the world to see all the time, if any time at all.  Before social media, the only way you'd do that is have face to face conversation with someone.  And you'd temper your remarks, being mindful of whomever it is you're talking to.  With social media, you're giving blanket statements without any regard for how you might come across to someone else.  Thus revealing problems with the written word.... with the number one problem there being context and perception.  How you speak something can be a night and day difference from how you print it.  And I really believe people's sensitivity needs to be considered.  I know what some might say if they read that.... "oh, you mean the snowflakes."  Which only would solidify my argument.  

The whole "Snowflake" moniker, toward someone who appears sensitive, is absolutely offensive to me.  Here's the thing... since facebook and others have come to prominence, mental health issues have only increased in numbers.  When you say something like what you're reading here right now in print, you're saying in your own mind how it's being said.  You're not saying it how I might say it.  Verbal expression would be key in how you perceive messaging.  Not to mention, unless the user deletes what they've written, the written word is there to stay and isn't going anywhere.  Words in the wind pass the instant they're said, relying only on the memory of the person they're spoken to for record.  This isn't all to say that the spoken word is necessarily better than the written one - but the written word needs more care in its crafting, given its relative permanence.

Thus, I've taken a sabbatical from facebook and Insta.  I am on Twitter/X, but really just to see what others are talking about.  Engaging in social media conversations opens that door just a crack for misinterpretation, which can wind up being quite damaging.  If I'm on facebook every day, or semi-regularly even, then I'm expected to say Happy Birthday or Happy Anniversary or Congratulations for whatever, and if I don't, I'm not a "friend".  Not a real one.  What a load of horseshit.  If we gauge each others' friendships based on our social media presence, then we don't actually have a life at all, do we?  At least not with those who merit friendships that way.

I'm not saying, either, that I haven't taken part in that very type of conduct.  Like I said, I cringe at some of the things I've posted in the past.  I'm far from a perfect friend to anyone.  Even some blogs in the past I feel are cringeworthy.  But when it comes to my blog page, you don't have to visit it.  When you go to facebook, you have all your "friends" right there in your face telling you something that just might piss you off that you didn't have to see in the first place.  That you didn't want to see.  At least with this blog page, you have a general idea of what you'll get because it's only me.  My point of view IS the point of this page.  And my point of view is no more valid than yours, just because it's on a blog on the internet.  But, sometimes it can be entertaining.  In my case, I kind of hope for that.

I read recently that a potentially cataclysmic event could happen in the next year, with solar flares possibly being so severe that it could disable the internet entirely, because it relies so heavily on satellites.  What if the internet were wiped out?  What would we do?  Beyond business transactions and power sharing, etc., we would actually be forced to talk to each other.  I think that's a nightmare scenario in itself for a lot of us.  But that's only because we've let social media rewire how we're expected to communicate with one another.  The more distant the contact, often the more distant the relationship.  There's face to face conversation - then there's the postal letter - then there's the telephone - then there's social media - and now texting.  The next form of communication that arrives to us will likely pull us even further away from one another.  I have social anxiety, so chronic that it forced me out of work permanently.  I have to wonder if this would be so if it weren't for the faux-connectivity the internet has provided us.  I only started hating the phone after social media showed up.  It seems the more "connected" we become, the more we de-evolve, actually.  And I don't know if this is something that can be reversed, short of a potential disaster like I noted above.

Anyway, to those who I might have miffed by not being present online, it's not some kind of personal affront.  Not as much as it's an experiment of my own to see how distancing myself from social media affects my own health.  And I would have to say, after over a month, everyone should at least try doing this.  It really does change your outlook.

I'll continue to keep this blog active, though.  I like to write.  I also very much appreciate you reading what I write, should you be reading this right now.  

Thanks for visiting my humble blog.  

Special thanks to Kelly.  (she knows why)